For the love of the sport.....

Saturday proved an exausting day for me- 3 games and a scrimmage to officiate.  My Cardiotrainer App on my phone tells me that I burned approximately 3000 calories over the course of the day.  Exhausting!  While it was a great day of skating- it was not without it's rough patches.

My first reffing partner of the day- awesome.  We got along great, had good rapport.  He had taken a few years off when he started a family with his wife and I couldn't believe when he said he was 35.  It was great to have such an affinity with a fellow ref on the ice- I will work with him anytime- which he said was mutual. We worked well together, covered the ice when the other was blocked from proceeding to follow play, had a pow-wow over what call to make (which resulted in a very exciting penalty shot).  Awesome.  It was an awesome game- the teams were great, the coaches were great, everyone was great.

It seemed like a good start to the day....

As some of you know,  I've been an ice hockey referee for 5 years or so now.  I ref because I love the game (cliff notes version).  After one game at BIG 3 earlier this season,  my reffing partner, who I have worked with a number of times, over all of the seasons I have been involved on the officiating side,  explained that his next game was at a neighboring town and with a team that has a terrible reputation.  I wondered how terrible this team could be but then brushed it aside- afterall, we all have our bad days.  Perhaps this was a rumor gone awry.

Mid-day Saturday, I believe I met this team with the terrible reputation.  Let me tell you- their preceding reputation did not even do them justice (and not  in a good way).  I have never worked with such a team.  I doubt I will ever meet their equal in poor attitude, terrible sportsmanship, lack of manners, and complete disregard for how they speak to others.  I'm speaking specifically about the coaching staff.  The coaching staff complained about being told their kids mouth guards needed to be in.  Mouth guards being a safe guard against concussions that can end a sports career and cause permanent brain damage.  I even had to send one of the coaches to the locker room.  He had already received a bench minor and I had had enough.  The players reflected the poor attitude and bad sportsmanship displayed by their coaches.  These kids are the kids that are really very good, but just not quite good enough to make the A-team.  It's one of those terrible decisions where teams have to get picked and they're all neck and neck so they probably just end up drawing straws (this is especially true in ice hockey because there is only 1 A-team allowed per association per age group).

My partner for the game was like wall paper.  Still fairly young to the officiating side of the sport- he contributed little and had nothing to offer in terms of being a partner on the ice.  It was hugely frustrating.  The wrath of the coaches and parents were directed only in my direction.  Usually I try to make conversation with my associate referee before we go out for a game- get at least their name and how long they've been involved with officiating and playing ice hockey.  It's usually a good launching pad for more conversation.  From  my partner on Saturday for the two game set- nothing.  He was more into his phone than getting his mind set for the game.  I've never been so disappointed in a reffing partner.  I walked into the ref room and immediately apologized for being late and explained that I had  a migraine headache that I was still fending off.  He didn't even look up from his phone.  It was a bad sign and as I tried a few more times to get him to talk to me before the game (within reason) I knew things were not going to go well.  It was clear he had no people skills and was not interested in Dale Carnegie.

Saturday night when I arrived home, I was seriously questioning whether or not to continue after this season as an ice hockey referee.  This morning, I realize that this is one bad team with a terrible attitude that is not only hurting themselves, but their team mates, the parents, the team's association, and the sport of ice hockey.

Referee Roundup

My return to refing, overall, went well.  I have to admit though, that I felt slow and sluggish after the first game, and by the end of the second period of the second game- I was wondering how I would survive the last period of the evening.  It was exciting to be back.  I had the opportunity to ref two girls' games- which was great.   One of the coaches during the first game, was confussed about icing vs. off-sides-- the call that I made and why the face off was where the face off was.  The "good ol' boys" club still exists...
coach: "I've been coaching for 15 years and that call was supposed to be icing."
me/ref: "the puck was shot from the red line, and your player preceeded the puck into the offensive zone.  The face off occured where the puck was shot from and the call was not icing- it was off sides.  The player was over the line before the puck crossed the red line."

The two coaches continued to attempt to tell me I was wrong.  This basic rule of off sides was clearly violated.  Another parent watching the game affirmed to my partner that the call and face off point was determined correctly.

So, it wasn't all smooth sailing during my time back on the ice.  The days afterwards my legs were sore.  So sore and stiff that walking, bending, kneeling, twisting-- was all painful.  I finally asked my fiance to assist me in two partner stretches that I remembered from high school track and field.  I've felt great ever since.  Clearly, even though I'm still in my 20s, my body doesn't rebound as quickly as it did even 3 years ago.  Again, I have had two kids since then- and that of course, is a major influencer.

My next ice hockey games aren't until January.  Tournaments will be increasing in frequency and tempers tend to flare over the plastic trophy that is at stake.

Tonight....

Tonight marks my return to refing ice hockey.  I have not refed a game since March 2009 (following the broken nose fiasco on February 28, 2009). 

I'm excited and nervous.  It's been so long since I refed a hockey game- nearly 2 years!  What?! How did that happen- oh right- I was pregnant all of last season. 

I have 2 girls games this evening.  They are both U10 girls.  This level has a lot of variation in playing level and ability.  One game that I did two seasons ago- the girls were pretty much standing around waiting for the puck.  I'm not sure which is better- everyone standing around waiting for the puck or everyone on the ice in a rugby scrum-like mob. 

Both aren't great.

Reffing two girls games for my return to refing does remind me how I started refing in the first place.  In college, I was super early to practice- our time and place had changed to the youth rink in Moorhead and it was highly out of the ordinary.  Better to be early than not show at all.  In this case, I ended up assisting my coach with pre-practice prep and toting things between the rinks, her car, and the youth rink.  We were just finishing up when the U12 girls game that was set to take place between a Fargo and Moorhead team was delayed because neither of the refs had shown up.  I wasn't certified.  I was just a college goal tender with my coaches whistle (made to be worn attached to her glove) and red wind pants.  One of the coaches had to get her helmet for me and remove the face shield- as I only had my goalie helmet.  I was all over the ice in my red wind pants.  I just imagine what the coaches and spectators/parents were thinking.  What a spectacle! I would have failed  and probably been kicked out of my referee association had I refed like that post-certification. 

The point is, had I not been willing or able to take on that challenge of refing that ice hockey game (with no experience as a ref) those players would not have been able to play. How disappointing for them!

I love refing. It's a way for me to give back and continue to provide players with the opportunity to play.  There are some jerk coaches and parents out there.  It can be difficult to keep your wits about you when someone is going ballistic or being a crab apple.  It also shows the young female players what they can aspire to once they are all grown up and not playing on a team anymore (whether they realize that now- I will never know).

Being a ref also reminds me of how I started playing hockey "late" but was on my inagural high school team- how far they have come since our first team was formed 12 years ago.  How I will always be a pioneer in hockey- even if I'm not a Natalie Darowitz- will never see the olympics as a teammate - I could possibly see the olympics as a ref.  Choosing to be a ref is something I take seriously but also have fun with- because just like "Doug" on The Cutting Edge I love the smell of the ice.  It helps me set an example for my own kids in terms of physical fitness and helps me to stay focused on that fitness for my overall health and well being so that I can be the active and fun parent I want to be.

(Having watched Wall-E last night, I find myself more motivated not to become sloth-like.)

Refing seminar

Yesterday, I attended a USA ice hockey referee clinic- which is a mandatory task each year you want to ref. Overall, it went well- for not skating in almost 2 years anyway. I admit that I was the first ref to take a fall on the ice. Another, older ref gave the" you owe me a beer" signal. A few minutes later, he was down on his keester. That's usually how those things work isn't it? You make fun of someone and then you find yourself in the same spot. This type of picking is expected at these clinics, so I took it all in stride with a big smile and laughing it off. Later, when we had circled up at center ice, following the warm up, one of the instructors made a point of mentioning that when the level 4 refs" shoot the duck" they fall. None of the level 2 refs fell during shoot the duck. His comment made me feel justified in falling earlier.

Again, for at least the third year in a row, I was the only female level 2 referee on the ice. Women refs are a rare breed in ice hockey. New referees, in general, only 10 to 20% come back for the next season. In my own district, there are only 4-6 women refs each year. I mentored a first year female ref one year for one game- I haven't seen her, or her name on any communications or at any events.

There is a glass ceiling in refereeing- women refs in the NHL for example. The district 1 referee in chief, had officiated some of my college games, and I asked afterward what I have to do to move up in the referee world. He gave me a list, and told me it was too late this year to do h.s. league because everything was already assigned. I told him that was ok, and I hadn't expected to move up to that level this year since I had a baby in June. I think I surprised him in my resoponse, that I needed to know so I can work towards it.

Overall, it felt really good to skate yesterday. I am reminded of muscles I had forgotten about.

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